06 May 2014

Running - Oh, the Places You Will Poop

The tone of this blog has been entirely too serious for some time now. As I ramp up running again in the two weeks of spring we get in Kansas, and inspired by my first weird pooping location of the year, I thought I would make a list of the places I have pooped while running. In no particular order:

1) Uncountable port-a-potties. Thank you, construction workers.
2) A ditch
3) Someone's front yard (I had no choice)
4) A cornfield
5) A trash can
6) Behind a dumpster
7) Behind so many trees 
8) Someone's backyard (unfenced) 
9) Gas stations, without buying anything, slinking out in shame
10) Gas stations, with the token purchase of a granola bar or a bottle of Gatorade to try and convince the attendant I had not just come there to poop
11) In the middle of the desert into a hole I dug with a jagged stone like a freaking caveman, at least five times
12) Behind a tractor (the tractor was in use when I came back by the scene of the crime)

There you go. If you are ever tempted to take me too seriously, you now have permission to refrain. I mean, I have pooped in people's yards for goodness sake's. Running is madness. 

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